Dreams Uninterrupted. . .

its fascinating... how your mind works... its fascinating... how it gives you the signs... its fascinating... how it lets you discover...

i thought for quite some time that i lost all the weight, became seriously ill & underweight, looked like a corpse & was under extreme amount of stress... for just 1 reason... the break up... i swore by it... until i realized... i wasn't in all that much love in the 1st place... all that i liked about him was that he was good looking... but he dint care... & i knew that from day 1... i always knew where it was heading & though i've cried a million rivers over it... frankly, im glad its over...

its funny... how i then dreamed a lot about my mother... about being in pain... even playing acoustic guitar...  technically, seeing your mom in your dreams denotes the fact that in your waking life, you have preoccupied thoughts in your mind that need sorting out... to dream of being in pain represents that you're being too hard on yourself about something that was not in your control... playing an acoustic guitar... ummmm... ill just say that it is fantasy based... though all of these could fit in with the break up stand... yet... there is this vivid dream i saw... that made me realize that my condition is not so because of the break up...

i saw a dream where i was standing against a huge wall with a olympic swimming pool sized puddle of mud in front of me fenced by 2 feet tall * 1/2 feet thick concrete walls on 2 sides...  & thorn wire mesh which needed to be jumped across to get to the safer land... i decide to step into the puddle instead of walking on the side concrete & realize that the puddle has a crocodile in it... & goodness gracious me... i still dont decide to walk on the fence.. i actually try & fight the croc... for my life... i try & kill it... & even though im not able to kill it, i successfully am able to evade its attacks by sitting on top of it... when i reach for the wire mesh... i see a monkey at the top, who tries to help me to get to the other side... & for some reason, i avoid the monkey & climb the wire mesh... jump on to the safer side & look behind at the croc with a sense of accomplishment... this dream represented exactly what was happening in my life then!!!

now... im not an expert on dreams... but i could trace this one to my real life stage by stage... step by step... & that's when i realized... all the stress & falling sick was because of this... this thing that was answered by this croc monkey dream... apparently... during my breakup time... i was also going through a bad career phase... i had consciously taken my career down the drain... i realized that within 10 days of the job... i wanted it so bad... but it was a bad bad career move... the people there showed me how miser they were even before i joined... the woman who took my interview... made me pay for the refreshments, but took the bill from me on purpose to get a reimbursement from the office... the boss was always in for a free treat... but whenever we went dutch, he took a walk.. anyway... so the conscious wrong career choice was stepping into the muddle... the croc represents a powerful person who will kill you... career wise... somebody powerful in the organization who always has his way & does not let you grow... but i being a stubborn ass fought the croc & dint give in... but even though i was fighting, he still was powerful... which lead to the stress... the monkey helping represents a cunning friend who helps for a purpose... & i did have offers from friends to switch... but declining help meant exactly what i did... i did not take anyone's favor...

today... im in a much better position... not stressed... smiling like before... the face dusn look pale anymore... thankfully, im not underweight either anymore --> that is such a relief to my mom!!! Dreams really help you interpret your life... dont ignore them... dont interrupt them... understand them... work on them... FIX YOUR LIFE!!!

Boys Vs Girls. . .

its so funny how certain things are taken for granted...

stupidly driven car --> must be a lady driver

pretty girl --> must be dumb

dumb act by a boy --> must be a sardar

& nobody raises their voice against it... it is so accepted.. universally...

<-- this caught my eye... im sure, its caught your eye too... i mean it is all over facebook... & im sure... you've all had a good laugh too... & i even am sure, many of you, googled it too.... why are women so ???

but did any of you try this... why are boys so GROSS! -->
i did... & of course, as expected... had my share of laugh too :D

The Waves. . .

Every time I write fiction... the women have had varied characteristics... but there has been 1 similarity amongst all the women I have mentioned... their lovely dark curly/wavy hair... every time a make a woman's sketch... she inevitably always has curly hair... you may wonder why... but I know why... its because even though I crib & complain most about the weight & hair woes... i still love to eat... & i still love the length on my hair!!!

Yes, i am not the drop dead gorgeous kind of women that men love & women envy... but i do have my way around men & i do have 1 thing that a lot of women envy... Being a southie, i am blessed with BEAUTIFUL dark locks... yes, they are unmanageable at times... but i know women who think that i go to salons to get my hair fixed... curly hair is the most prone to roughness... breakage... dryness... frizziness... split ends... the curlier it is... the more unmanageable it can be!!!

My Hair - when i play it into curls!!

Some things that work wonders for us... the curly types include...

* OLIVE OIL... I've heard about it... but i still am a coconut oil person... Southie you see... the point is... oiling your hair can help you get rid of roughness...

* The Wide toothed comb... yes our hair gets into a fight with combs... so why hurt them with the narrow combs... use wide toothed combs or plain & simple fingers... i even twist & turn & play my hair into curls when wet to manage the curls....

My Hair - When i open it post pleating!

* Shampoo twice a week... not more... not less... ive tried a plethora of Shampoos... some bring temporary relief.... but nothing permanent... the shampoo that suited me the most --> Dove Dry Care...

* Leave ons... i used to use Livon... it helps in managing the hair a bit... but leave it & the hair becomes even worse... believe it or not... i have researched like crazy & tried a million things to manage the curly while avoiding the frizz.... the cheapest worked the best for me... body lotion & i really mean body lotion... helps set your hair without damaging the heck outta it!!!

* Trimming.... i love my length... & hence i get a trim just 2X a year... but that is not good enough for curly hair... so i hit a pair of scissors & get rid of the split ends on a bright sunny day!!!

* Tie it up... i keep my hair open in the day... but the hair is the safest when tied up... so make sure you keep your hair tied up as much as you can to avoid the damage... but curly/wavy hair takes the shape in which it is tied up, so be careful about that... i pleat it up mostly, so that if i have to step out suddenly, i can simply open it & i am good to go with my lovely waves in place!!!

An Apple a Day... Keeps the Berry at Bay!!!

Have you ever regretted words that flew outta your mouth? i dont mean the bad words... everyone regrets those... i mean, the big promises that are soooooo outta reach, but you still make those in anticipation of good times??? stuff like... when you promise your baby sister that you will throw her birthday party... & because you are a woman of your words... you throw that party & end up so broke that you cant throw a birthday party for yourself the following month... well... i could not celebrate my birthday... but thankfully, at least my sister had a celebration the way she wanted!!! regret it for self... not the whole picture!!!

so... i bought a blackberry in august this year... & my sister accompanied me when i bought the same.... shortly after i got my BB, she started saying that all her frenz are askin her to switch 2 a bb too... (well, ive changed 13 phones in the last 9 years... 9 of these were bought for valid reasons such as losing a phone or it died for whatever reason... the other 4 were because I JUST WANTED THEM!!! Nokia 7610 & 5800 express music were 2 of those... blackberry was the 3rd & 4th is...... ... ...) & i dunno what made me say it, but i remember saying it so clearly... when i get my iPhone, i will gift you this blackberry!!! yep the 4th 1 is an iPhone!!! the BB was with me for just 3 months - 3 days!!!

I know a lot of people who own a BB would go like... why why why? how can you LEAVE a BB??? how can you leave BBM?? well... but thats all that it has to it... it IS a corporate phone... the best of the breed in terms of emails & calender sync... what push it has... so robust... you can literally have a bus run over it without losing a key... but damn man.. does it hang.... & the forever take out the battery & place it back... pheew!!! + BBM... most of my frenz who are on BBM are ALSO on whatsapp... so nothing lost there... can easily stay in touch... dammit even the messages are free man... big deal with the BBM... in fact, im kinna thankful, i dont needta see the same forwards coming from the entire list & the "broadcast this or 10 years of bad sex" messages... Seriously... Blackberry vs iPhone???

after the Nokia 5800, i had become a touch person.. the hard key pads are not for me anymore... i love the iPhone.. yes, you BB lovers, i LOVE THE iPHONE BETTER ANYDAY... yes, it is fragile, but, all that BB is that iPhone is not, is robust... i know you would say you cant customize ringtones, alarms etc... wake up... Apple store... apps to fix those... but, frankly, i dont mind the Marimba... + iPhone is a media consumer's dream... movies... music at ease.. the sexy bump to exchange... motion gaming... i mean, bow down to gaming engineering here man... it has the BEST TOUCH...  the capacitive touch & motion sensing... AWESOME... i mean, finger zoom in & pinch zoom out... CRAZYYYYY... what storage... CPU... RAM... the sexiest GUI.. its super hip & trendy TOO (the show off factor)... bye bye BBM, i dont miss you... Whatsapp it is... & not to forget the best thing... PC like web browsing... \m/

Not only do i not like iPhone better because of its looks, feel & utility... i actually also save Rs. 300 on a monthly basis... cuz i dont need the 399 BB plan anymore... all that i need is a Rs. 98 Internet plan... all said & done, BB is great... but it is so corporate... iPhone is better... it so is ME!!!

Is Death the Real Answer???

The Crime Scene…

As he lay there in blood, his eyes began to dwindle & he went down the memory lane… Death is peaceful, in spite of the physical pain… he overheard a man “one down” & another man approaching, screaming “here… here” but he din’t wanna live again… what more did life have to offer… except some more pain!

Past…

Jerry had been married to Rene for 12 years… they married young… they were stupid… but till date, they were so in love! They had promised each other till death do us apart & death got better off with them, it seemed… He opened his eyes & saw her in a pool of blood next to him, as the medics removed the knife out of his body & covered his wounds to take him away… he reached out to her hand & held it so tight one last time before the medics actually pulled him away!

The Investigation…

There were no signs of robbery… no signs of breaking in or force used… seems like the attacker knew the victims well enough… it was not before 4 days in the hospital that he showed signs of recovery… the police questioned him, but he could not remember a thing… how was his wife murdered so brutally… why was he stabbed in the chest… who were they with… he did not remember anything from before 8 hours of his wife’s murder… he did not even remember that he was stabbed & that he opened his eyes & held his wife’s hand before being brought to the hospital… the reports showed signs of date rape in both his & his wife’s body!

The questions…

he could not remember anything … where was i??? what was I doing??? he asked the police… the medics… everyone… it seemed he was going crazy… he said he had vivid dreams that he killed his wife... he kept saying all the time… I killed my wife… I killed my wife… so much so, that he was sent to rehab… but no use… I killed my wife… I killed my wife… it had been 2 months & there were no leads on the case… by then Jerry had tried to kill himself 7 times… & it seemed he genuinely believed he killed his wife… until he was successful to kill himself in the 8th time “to be united with his wife in heaven or hell!!!”

The tipping point…

A night before the kill… Jerry & Rene were out with their old time college buddies… they boozed like they were in college & that’s where they got the roofies in their bodies from too… Allen who had loved Rene from college days was trying to get fresh with her & Jerry could not take the same… He knew Rene loved him but he still could not control his anger & had an unreasonable fight with her on the way back… Rene even apologized to calm him down but that infuriated him even more… he thought that she is apologizing because she was wrong & in a rage of fury he stabbed her over & over & killed his beautiful wife… & when he realized what he had done.. he did not want to live anymore… so he stabbed himself as well… for redemption… no wonder Death was peaceful… no wonder death was more peaceful than living anymore!